Starting in the middle.
Have you ever felt trapped? Trapped within yourself? Your mind wants to do so much. You want to put your heart and soul in it but when its time, you can't find the energy. You feel like blaa!! But there is nothing to feel blaa about. You can accomplish so much, you want to accomplish so much. But somehow you can't make yourself go forward.
Sometimes it takes life altering events to get you up and going. Your life is passing by and you haven't accomplished what you set out to do.
In the year 2016, within one year my life changed. First my mom passed away from Alzheimer's. Leap year. She passed on Feb, 29th right on my aunts birthday and two day before mine. It was a strenuous time.
I was getting winded easy around this time. I went for a stress test and failed. So they sent me in for a heart catheter in June. I ended up having two stents put in. A week later I had a stroke. Later that year in November, I had a heart attack. I had to retire from my job because I could no longer perform my duties. I was a laborer and belonged to union 1098. I worked in concrete, a very demanding and physically demanding job. I worked as a laborer since 1989, 27 years in the field. One of the few females in the industry at the time. In 2017 I lost my health insurance because I could not afford the payments. None of my doctors wanted to see me anymore! So hear I am with heart problems. No doctors want to see me because of no insurance. My prescription cost are outrageous. I am not old enough for medicare. I make to much on my pension for state help. All those years of paying into the state and when you ask for help. They demoralize you and make you feel worthless. I have worked non stop since 1978. That is 40 years of working, even longer if you want to count school cafeteria. And now that I need the most help, I feel abandoned.
Lets step back a few years. In around 2009 or 10 I was having severe back pain. I had an cat-scan done. I have 2 herniated disk, degenerative disc disease, curvature of the spine and spinal stenosis. So I was put on medication, for pain. It helped somewhat. The medication I was on they decided to market it as a narcotic. So I then had to go see a pain management doctor. He put me on 3 different medications, two were narcotic. I had several shots in my back and a couple in my wrist (carpal tunnel).
Now comes the time where I am supposed to go in for stress and blood test. The paper work said, Do Not take any medication. So I didn't. I called my pain management and explained it. They said okay. It was two days later when I had to go get my refills on my medication. I had to give a urine sample that time around so I did. Well guess what happens? You guessed it. None of the medication was in my system so now they wouldn't refill my pain meds! Really! I called and told them what was going on, just like I was supposed to. Didn't matter. So now they took them away and I had to compensate some how. Withdrawals very much so.
I lost all interest in my writing, I went into a depression. I am just now getting back to somewhat of my old self.
In the year 2016, within one year my life changed. First my mom passed away from Alzheimer's. Leap year. She passed on Feb, 29th right on my aunts birthday and two day before mine. It was a strenuous time.
I was getting winded easy around this time. I went for a stress test and failed. So they sent me in for a heart catheter in June. I ended up having two stents put in. A week later I had a stroke. Later that year in November, I had a heart attack. I had to retire from my job because I could no longer perform my duties. I was a laborer and belonged to union 1098. I worked in concrete, a very demanding and physically demanding job. I worked as a laborer since 1989, 27 years in the field. One of the few females in the industry at the time. In 2017 I lost my health insurance because I could not afford the payments. None of my doctors wanted to see me anymore! So hear I am with heart problems. No doctors want to see me because of no insurance. My prescription cost are outrageous. I am not old enough for medicare. I make to much on my pension for state help. All those years of paying into the state and when you ask for help. They demoralize you and make you feel worthless. I have worked non stop since 1978. That is 40 years of working, even longer if you want to count school cafeteria. And now that I need the most help, I feel abandoned.
Lets step back a few years. In around 2009 or 10 I was having severe back pain. I had an cat-scan done. I have 2 herniated disk, degenerative disc disease, curvature of the spine and spinal stenosis. So I was put on medication, for pain. It helped somewhat. The medication I was on they decided to market it as a narcotic. So I then had to go see a pain management doctor. He put me on 3 different medications, two were narcotic. I had several shots in my back and a couple in my wrist (carpal tunnel).
Now comes the time where I am supposed to go in for stress and blood test. The paper work said, Do Not take any medication. So I didn't. I called my pain management and explained it. They said okay. It was two days later when I had to go get my refills on my medication. I had to give a urine sample that time around so I did. Well guess what happens? You guessed it. None of the medication was in my system so now they wouldn't refill my pain meds! Really! I called and told them what was going on, just like I was supposed to. Didn't matter. So now they took them away and I had to compensate some how. Withdrawals very much so.
I lost all interest in my writing, I went into a depression. I am just now getting back to somewhat of my old self.
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